In South Sudan, cattle represent far more than livestock. They symbolize wealth, pride, and social standing, and in marriage negotiations, the number of cows offered as bride price often determines a man’s seriousness and value.
But for Buong Arop, even doing everything expected was not enough.
The young South Sudanese man has gone viral on social media after sharing an emotional open letter addressed to his childhood girlfriend—one he said he loved deeply, courted respectfully, and hoped to marry.
According to Arop, he had assembled 105 cows as bride price in a bid to secure her hand in marriage. His rival, he claimed, brought 90 cows. By traditional standards, Arop believed he had done more than enough to win the family’s approval.
However, the woman’s family reportedly chose the other suitor, not because of what he offered, but because he was from within their community.
Arop explained that his rival was a “homie,” someone with local ties, while he had travelled long distances across Mayath and Cueibet, deep into Gok, to Bhargel, to formally seek the woman’s hand.
He said his intentions went beyond marriage alone, adding that he hoped their union would strengthen ties between two communities—Duony Payam and Bhar-Gel of Achol Malek Payam—by building a lasting bond between their families.
Despite approaching the family peacefully and respectfully, Arop said he was treated like a stranger and eventually rejected.
Instead of reacting with anger, he chose to express his pain through a farewell letter that has since touched thousands online.
In the letter, Arop reflected on the heartbreak of loving someone sincerely and still losing them, stating that while he had decided to let her go, his heart had not fully accepted it.
He described how the rejection left him quietly devastated, admitting that he broke down in tears without anyone noticing.
Arop also made it clear that he did not blame the woman, but rather her family’s decision, which he believed was influenced by loyalty to someone closer to home.
Ending the letter with goodwill, he wished her peace in her new marriage and entrusted the situation to God, saying perhaps it was destined long before they ever fell in love.
The letter has since gone viral, drawing emotional reactions from people across Africa who say they relate to the pain of giving everything, doing all the right things, and still losing love for reasons beyond their control.
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